I am often fascinated by the uniqueness and detailed process that is required to create a piece of Artwork. Any kind.
From writing a piece of poetry to crafting an outfit or designing the architectural structure of a building…it all requires a detailed process.
A process requires patience, it requires diligence and intuitive grace. I can’t rush it, push it or fake it. It has to run its course.
This piece is not finished yet. However, it has taught me already a simple but valuable lesson: though things might end up being different than what I’ve planned, they are not necessarily a mistake. Each layer reminds me of why I love mixed media in the first place. There are no mistakes that holds no value in this form of art.
This is true in life as well.
I don’t always have to know the ending, or be able to predict the outcome…I can choose to trust the process. I can let the process show me where to go and what changes or adjustments to make. I can let it run its course and use the experiences of my life to create new layers, new ground, new expectations.
I indeed needed that reminder today as a mom.
I had a whole different idea of what motherhood was going to be like.
I had an initial plan, a strategy, sort of like a blueprint, an idea of the mom I wanted to be and how I wanted my relationship with my children to be. The problem is that I forgot about the process, and the intuitive grace that is required for this task!
Ahh… how wrong I was.
After all the hard work and all the books read, I still have not figured out. When I think I’ve got a better idea of how to make it work, the process shows me something different. 🙂 I feel most times like I do not know what I am doing. I don’t know what the outcome will be. Things are changing, kids are growing, I’m evolving and I no longer have the same blueprint. Actually, I don’t have one at all.
This I know, I will keep showing up. Even when I can’t guarantee the outcome, even when all I can see is one layer at a time…I know at the end of this process there will be a beautiful masterpiece.
That masterpiece will be a tender reminder that those layers were not in vane, those layers are proof that I’ve been moving through the seasons doing the work. Loving well, to the best of my ability. Not always perfect, but steady.
I can’t rush it, I can’t fake it.
I choose to trust the process. I choose to trust the One who placed me in this role in the first place. I leave the outcome in his hands.
I will be kind to myself in this process.